Depression – From the Outside

by becomingbethany

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month and the dear ones I love who have struggled and those who still struggle with clinical depression.

I do not know what depression feels like. I know how it feels to be very sad. I know how it feels to be very tired. I know what it is like to be discouraged. I have wanted to give up so I know what that feels like too. But I have not had to live with day-in and day-out depression so I do not know what it feels like.

I know what depression looks like. It looks exhausting. It looks overwhelming. It looks really, really hard. Sometimes it looks really brave. And sometimes it looks really sad.

I know what it feels like to love someone fighting hard against depression. I know what it feels like to love someone who is overcome by depression. I know what it feels like to want to hug away all the bad feelings. I know what it feels like to want to do absolutely anything to make you feel happy and loved and encouraged and strong.

In my attempt to love my dear ones with depression, I have smothered. I have retreated. I have been scared. I have been pushy. I have listened. I have shouted. I have given up. And I have come back again.

I do not know what depression feels like but I love you. I do not want to fix you but I do want to understand you better. If there is anything I can do to help ease the pain or help carry the burden, let me know. I want you to feel loved and seen and valued because you so are. 

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